See, I wasn't counting on MTV to pull the Andy Samberg card. Those bastards must have known that I would follow him to the ends of the earth, singing Iran So Far Away and the Awesometown intro until I collapsed from heat exhaustion and/or severe frostbite. All it took was Andy, and just like that I was back to a show that insists that Twilight is a better movie than The Dark Knight, Iron Man and Slumdog Millionaire.
Horrible? Yes. An absolute travesty? Duh. Yet I knew Twilight was going home with the gold. Anyone who has ever watched MTV should have. But just because I had to watch them present golden popcorn to people who destroy my faith in humanity didn't mean I wasn't going to laugh.
And so laugh I did. It wasn't as funny as it could have been, but my love for Andy Samberg has in no way diminished. His intro had some great moments, including Aziz Ansari making the Spocks cry like little bitches, Andy and his buddy Justin Timberlake having an awkward encounter and Andy insisting "No, you're the a-hole" to President Barack Obama. The ensuing monologue could've used a little work, but let's be real: it would've been legen- wait for it- dary if the notoriously broody Robert Pattinson had *actually* put his hands up for playing Edward Cullen. Have a sense of humor, Pattsy. Half of the world is laughing at you already.
Next, some awards were given out. Eminem performed. I didn't care. Then came something magical. Something that all those stupid Samberg critics should take a good hard look at. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you "Explosions":
Where do I even begin? The whole concept is genius, first of all. Andy's outfit is also a win. Will Ferrell...was alright I guess. Not gratingly annoying like he usually is nowadays, so he's got that going for him. And that keyboard solo? My opinion of J.J. Abrams just went from "he's a moderately cool guy" to "OMJJ can we please hang out and be best friends for life??"
The rest of the show never really matched that level of awesomeness, but Andy still had some tricks up his sleeve. My second favorite was probably his Doubt Digital Short, complete with video game action so good it's sacrilegious...and Kiv!
Obviously if Andy's Lonely Island partners had been more involved, the show would have been more consistently hilarious. There was definitely a Jorma deficiency. Seeing him weep after Forest Whitaker, Leann Rimes and Chris Isaak's take on some of the Dudes' greatest hits was definitely not enough. I mean, I was practically crying after that awful display. The concept has worked before (see Josh Groban in "I'm F**king Ben Affleck") but you DO NOT let Leann Rimes mess with "Jizz in My Pants." You just don't. It could have been funny if she and her cohorts were backing up normal performances by the Lonely Island, but this so-called tribute was just bad. I was a little less angry at Forest Whitaker, though. He was kinda amusing, and still has about 500 Last King of Scotland points, as well as 5 million "Blame It" points, to use up before he's on my bad side.
I end this recap with an earnest plea to movie executives: make Andy's proposed project Driving Miss Daisy: The Early Years, starring Leighton Meester and Lil' Wayne, a reality. You probably think I'm greedy after the announcement that Ed Westwick will play Heathcliff in a new Wuthering Heights, but we all need this. If anything can bring about world peace, it's a movie where Lil' Wayne drives Blair Waldorf around in her limo. You better believe there would be an original KMDB movie poster if I actually had PhotoShop. Until that wonderful day comes, I leave some visual aids for your imagination/consideration.
Think about it.
2 comments:
After watching "Explosions", the commercial I was forced to watch before the digital short was for Transformers 2.
Coincidence? Or brilliant marketing?
I have a super-duper nerd crush on JJ Abrams. His solo was just adorable.
Also, just say the word and I'll make that Driving Miss Daisy poster. Hilarious.
Post a Comment