The Obligatory [Pre-]Oscar Post

C’mon, you knew this was coming sooner or later. I blog about movies; you can’t expect me to snub the Oscars, even if they've snubbed the likes of Cary Grant and Stanley freakin' Kubrick.

*Deep breath* I digress. The Oscar nominations come out in just three more days and before they’re released, I wanted to share a sort of wishlist with all of you, and the Academy, who I’m sure bookmarked this blog long ago. Some of the items on here are, well, a little improbable but it's Martin Luther King Day and dammit, I have a dream!

I don't really know how I can top that horrible reference, so without further ado, I present my Oscar wishlist:

1. A complete Benjamin Button shut-out

Am I the only one who thought this movie was an absolute disaster? Almost anyone who’s seen it will say “It was a little too long…” but no one has the guts to speak the truth: it was crap. It pains me to admit this as a Cate Blanchett fanatic, but the characters (even hers) were bland and the story was a mess – one of the most superficial that I’ve ever seen (bet you thought that stupid backwards clock, or Hurricane Katrina tie-in, was going to go somewhere but nope sorry! We were too busy adding 43598743895 other underdeveloped and boring storylines to flesh that out). I will grant that the visuals were stunning, which is why I won’t get grumpy over an Art Direction win, but please for the love of God do not let this movie get a Best Picture nod (or even worse, win) over its far more deserving competitors. Which brings me to my second point…

2. Some Revolutionary Road love

First of all, let me say that I had to work to see this movie. I have no idea why the distributors decided to put a Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet movie in five theaters across the nation, but they did and it was pretty frustrating. It would be very easy for me to have some mild, irrational resentment towards Revolutionary Road because of the inconvenience, but I have none at all; I absolutely loved it. The movie was devastating and haunting, the questions it raised were complex and interesting and Kate and Leo gave two enthralling performances. So why oh why is it being almost completely overlooked? I truly believe it merits Best Picture and Best Director nods, but I can deal with those snubs, even though I’m seething that Benjamin Button will probably get both. It’s nothing sort of criminal, however, that Leo is almost certainly going to be ignored (yet again). If Brad “so dull I considered tearing my hair out to spice things up” Pitt gets the slot over Leo, I will be sorely disappointed. And by sorely disappointed, I mean I might punch a hole in a wall.

3. A nod for Robert Downey, Jr. in Tropic Thunder

Argue the movie’s weaknesses with me all you want, but Robert Downey, Jr. absolutely deserves a nomination for Tropic Thunder. What he pulled off was nothing sort of genius. A lesser actor would no doubt have inspired enormous public outrage, but he turned the role into one of the most hilarious in recent memory, and kept it controversy-free. He gave a quote to Entertainment Weekly in March of ’08 that pretty much sums the whole thing up (leave it to him to do everything right): “If [the part is] done right, it could be the type of role you called Peter Sellers to do 35 years ago. If you don’t do it right, we’re going to hell.” Robert, needless to say you are definitely not going to hell. (You're going to comedy heaven! High five, anyone?)

4. Slumdog Millionaire Best Picture win

Having seen all the major BP contenders, (excepting longshot The Wrestler), I’m officially pulling for Slumdog Millionaire. It’s not only one of the most inspiring movies I’ve seen in years, it’s just a wonderfully made film that deserves every one of its accolades. Now, I wouldn’t be outraged if Milk pulled an upset and took the prize, but Slumdog is still my number one and, from the way the awards season has been going, it may very well receive this honor. Lest you doubt its merit, I dare you to watch this and not hand over the award right away (if you haven't seen the movie, though, start it at about 1:07):

5. More Ricky Gervais

Let’s see: he was hilarious at the Emmys, hilarious at the Golden Globes and is generally a hilarious guy. It still mystifies me that Hugh Jackman and not Ricky is hosting the Oscars, but I’ll settle for another one of his amusing award presentations.

Oh right, and give Kate Winslet a damn Oscar!

The Quintessential College Movies That Aren't Really about College

There are some things you just can't avoid in college.  While beer pong and The Dave Matthews Band are probably the most inescapable, I've realized that there are even certain movies you're bound to end up watching at some point during those four years.  Since my penchant for lists must be clear by now, follow me as I discuss the most unavoidable (for better or worse) college movies.

1.  Fight Club (1999)

Despite the fact that Fight Club's most ardent fans are probably those in their mid- to late-teens, it is actually possible to avoid seeing this in high school.  In fact, after my first time watching it (in the midst of my senior year), I had a pretty hard time finding someone to discuss it with.  But once your failure to see it becomes known on a college campus, you might go one more hour without this apparent sin being rectified.  So why is it so popular?  The fact that it is arguably Brad Pitt's best role (and that he's shirtless and buff for a good deal of it) has a lot to do with it.  Ed Norton also has a pretty big collegiate following.  But it's probably that huge WTF? ending that makes watching it, often more than once, such a necessity.  

2.  Garden State (2004)

Who would've thought that Scrubs's most cheerful manboy, Dr. John Dorian, had so many inner demons?  Certainly not most of Zach Braff's pre-established fans.  The sheer surprise at his oh-so-artsy tribute to New Jersey might explain some of the interest it it, but really we all know that the soundtrack is what made this movie so popular.  It almost single-handedly launched the career of The Shins and made "Such Great Heights" a new favorite song of teens and countless commercials alike.

3.  Almost Famous (2000)

I was most surprised to discover that this was such a college must-see, but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense.  First and foremost, it pays homage to '70s rock 'n roll, a genre rivaled perhaps only by the bro music of Jack Johnson and Co. as the most preferred of college students.  Secondly, it laces this music into a sweet coming-of-age tale featuring a blend of wonderful under-the-radar actors and NBC's comedy line-up (including Rainn Wilson as a Rolling Stone editor.  If you didn't notice it the first time, rewatch it!  Trust me, seeing Dwight Schrute in a curly '70s fro and equally amusing outfit is so worth it).  You really have to wonder why Kate Hudson doesn't make movies like this anymore...  

  

4.  Pulp Fiction (1994)

This one's kind of a no-brainer.  It's got cult figure Samuel L.  "Motherfucking Snakes" Jackson as the ultimate badass, paired with the quirky choice of John "Grease Lightening" Travolta in one crazy bloody (hot? tranny?) mess of a movie.  The dialogue is offbeat, the sequences memorable, and structure as non-linear as you can get, making it the perfect companion to the equally offbeat, memorable (and regarding our recollections of some particularly inebriated nights, non-linear) college experience.

      

5.  At Least Two "Classic" Will Ferrell Comedies  

You're bound to get introduced to a few new comedians while at college, but it would seem that Will Ferrell is the most universal fail-safe.  Which is why I think it's safe to say you'll have to watch not just one, but two (or, depending on the crowd, closer to twenty-two) of his movies.  It's a bit unfair to call Wedding Crashers a Will Ferrell movie, considering he's barely in it, so I'd bet that those two choices are going to be the middle-aged, contemporary retelling of Animal House, Old School, and what is probably Ferrell's Citizen Kane, Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy.  If you're looking for a little-seen toned-down Ferrell though (contrary to popular belief, it does exist), definitely check out Stranger Than Fiction, or Dick for all you history nerds out there (despite its X-rated title, it's a Watergate spoof, with Ferrell as Bob Woodward).